I am increasingly fascinated by the extent to which we create our own hell.
We say “yes” way more than we should, both at work and at home. We set unnecessarily high expectations for ourselves and become obsessed with meeting those when no one is looking for that much from us. Then we wonder why we’re miserable. *facepalm*
I talk about this with clients and I think about this a lot personally as well. I try to be very conscience of regularly asking myself, “Do I really HAVE to do that?”
What are often labeled as “must do” items are actually “want to do” items. When we choose to make “wants” into “musts” (and yes, we do have that choice), we choose to be more stressed. Why do this?
During this time of year when stress is intense and it’s so easy to have especially high expectations for ourselves, I’ve challenged myself a lot on what I truly must do, and what I can say no to. Here are 10 things I’ve let go of.
Most offices have the superhuman employee. Sometimes whole companies are made of these working-a-million-hours-always-taking-on-more-ever-so-committed people. Are you one of the superhumans? Are you requiring others to be?
This topic is on my mind a lot right now for several reasons. For the past two weeks, I've been bombarded with articles, videos, and conversations on this subject. It's to the point of being eerie. Have you been reading a lot about this as well? Additionally, this topic resonates with me because I certainly wrestle with the inclination to try to be superhuman. I'm working a lot now on addressing that because I know it's not healthy for me or my family. I also do not I do my best work under these circumstances, which means it's not fair to my clients.
The first nudge on this topic was this article on 60-hour work weeks that my friends at Dress for Success Indianapolis shared. It's short and I found it hard-hitting. If we are working 60-hour work weeks, SOMETHING IS WRONG. I don't know how many times I've said that phrase to myself lately. I love that the article talks about the prospect that maybe our job is ill-designed and resources are limited...it's not just pointing a finger at being a perfectionist or workaholic (although those can be issues, too).